| 9487 |
main |
3.72 |
Aug 21, 2010 |
chris_ninety1
|
Walking back from your house, walking on the moon. |
 |
| Aug 28, 2010 |
*M* elzaban
|
After watching Earth get blown to pieces from his vantage point on the Moon, Todd felt it was necessary to perform a very appropriate moonwalk. |
| 9480 |
main |
3.92 |
Aug 16, 2010 |
*M* elzaban
|
"Free at last from my vegetable prison!" |
 |
| Aug 28, 2010 |
potatoE
|
Nintendo, disappointed with H.R. Giger's art direction in the latest Earthworm Jim game, opted to make the Wii version more compatible with their loyal fanbase's expectations. |
| 9434 |
main |
3.83 |
Jul 3, 2010 |
Reecer6
|
Joe retrieved his arms from a safe too hard, ending up like an octopus. |
 |
| Jul 13, 2010 |
Mjollnir
|
"Too many arms but too less time", Smookey the Kraken thought trying to open the safe under the candlelight. |
| 9431 |
main |
3.26 |
Jun 29, 2010 |
IanBA
|
George Washington had a sh!t on a stick and told people it was OK to have unprotected sex. |
 |
| Jul 12, 2010 |
misterverymean
|
The dead mime found painting with toxic waste to be difficult during an earthquake, especially with a shelf filled with 5 white pots and the head of a red-eyed rat creature. |
| 9368 |
main |
3.76 |
Apr 25, 2010 |
theHominid
|
While sipping hot cocoa, Eragon and Borat plotted to take over the Middle East. |
 |
| May 8, 2010 |
ALXXMaXX
|
Ok, how about this, then? You, me, and the Computer Kid explode the earth, reassemble the pieces into a cow, and sell it to the Intergalactic Chef for a jillion smackaroos? Whaddaya thank, Scissors? What? No? |
| 9361 |
main |
3.58 |
Apr 18, 2010 |
Reecer6
|
OK, so GLaDOS, Darth Vader, and Problem Sleuth walk into a bar. PS tells the other two that he's awesome... |
 |
| May 18, 2010 |
Kanji_usagi
|
"so you see, kids," said Professor Teddy, "if you dont recycle glass bottles you become Darth Vader." |
| 9326 |
main |
3.67 |
Mar 18, 2010 |
Reecer6
|
Hero, please get me water from the fountain on the other side of the world because I'm too lazy to get some from this well. |
 |
| Mar 28, 2010 |
pinballwizard
|
When the curly mustached villain told Qimugkauyar the Inuit that he will relocate his people into the slums of Chile and Saudi Arabia, Qimugkauyar yelled "Not if I kick your ass first!" |
| 9317 |
main |
3.82 |
Mar 6, 2010 |
IanBA
|
What if the Nazis sold jews as slaves? |
 |
| Mar 24, 2010 |
Aussie-Evil
|
As the sun came closer to the earth, the Neo-Neo-Nazis finally completed their final goal. |
| 9297 |
main |
2.86 |
Feb 22, 2010 |
SwEeTiNsAnItY
|
Daddy, would you like some sausage? |
 |
| Feb 28, 2010 |
keenan_investig
|
Little Timmy was awoken from his peaceful slumber by a giant spotlight, and upon leaving his room found himself in a dungeon full of soot, gigantic spiders and a little yellow sock in the corner. |
| 9296 |
main |
3.44 |
Feb 22, 2010 |
IanBA
|
It's okay to be gay. |
 |
| Mar 1, 2010 |
lizard
|
Arch Bishop hates rainbows. This really puts purple-haired Waldo and Ness down in the dumps. |
| 9293 |
main |
2.89 |
Feb 20, 2010 |
Ringo
|
I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman. |
 |
| Feb 28, 2010 |
Reecer6
|
A cat holds onto a computer who's mouse says it's Superman Time, a girl in cyan clothes says "save the Earth," and a photo of a man says unequal. |
| 9267 |
main |
4.20 |
Feb 14, 2010 |
B0BBarker
|
Take off your shoes,give your feet some air, you can even sit around in your underwear. |
 |
| Feb 18, 2010 |
ninjacow
|
The flying lady in red cheerfully threatened to destroy the earth. |
| 9254 |
main |
3.54 |
Feb 11, 2010 |
Steniia
|
"Yarr, we be dock blocked!" yelled the pirate to his first mate as the speed boat zoomed past them and into port. |
 |
| Feb 15, 2010 |
jmomsu
|
Here is the Sun's favorite pickup line: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, or did a dog surving on a UFO break your fall? |
| 9221 |
main |
3.32 |
Feb 3, 2010 |
pinballwizard
|
Uh oh... Am I in trouble? |
 |
| Feb 7, 2010 |
CyanideNow
|
Jeff Goldblum ponders his next role, in the long-awaited sequel 'Five Days AFTER Independence Day,' in which another hostile alien race invades the earth. This time, Earth loses. |
| 9217 |
main |
4.41 |
Feb 1, 2010 |
Tymaporer
|
All shall fear the might of the Final Cinnamon Roll! |
 |
| Feb 5, 2010 |
*M* elzaban
|
Why did the cookie cross the Grand Canyon? To get to the other cactus! Wait, that's terrible. |
| 9195 |
main |
4.10 |
Jan 27, 2010 |
*M* elzaban
|
By the powers of Greyskull combined, I am Captain Planet! |
 |
| Jan 30, 2010 |
wamwam
|
Because Atlas was naked, it was hard to carry the Earth. Cyclopeses find it easy to carry the Earth because they have clothing. |
| 9165 |
main |
4.25 |
Jan 23, 2010 |
*M* elzaban
|
I have learned two things in my engineering law courses: lawyers are wizards, and lawyers are also alchemists. |
 |
| Jan 24, 2010 |
SuperstarSri
|
"In thirty years," our effeminate coach proclaimed, "blonde wizards and astronomers shall rule the earth." |
| 9138 |
main |
3.47 |
Jan 10, 2010 |
EmilyMoby
|
Mr. and Mrs. Pacman were imprisoned after James Bond caught them stealing conflict diamonds from Inky. |
 |
| Jan 22, 2010 |
spideydude
|
The Earth gave me a great idea for a Bond movie plot, but when it came time to write the script, it just gave me worthless gibberish. |
| 9098 |
main |
2.93 |
Dec 19, 2009 |
IanBA
|
Five years ago, I lost 30,000 men in the blink of an eye. And the world just fuckin' watched. Tomorrow there will be no shortage of volunteers, no shortage of patriots. I know you understand |
 |
| Dec 26, 2009 |
Kanji_usagi
|
Pac-Man:Earth eats people, not pellets. Meanwhile, Satan gets 3000 purple trombones for hitting the target bullseye in his sleep. |
| 9095 |
main |
3.44 |
Dec 19, 2009 |
IanBA
|
The healthy human mind doesn't wake up in the morning thinking this is its last day on Earth. But I think that's a luxury. Not a curse. To know you're close to the end is a kind of freedom. Good time to take...inventory. Outgunned. Outnumbered. Out of |
 |
| Dec 29, 2009 |
Reecer6
|
In purpleland, a nuclear explosion happens behind the mountains. A man walking off screen is shot as his buttocks questions Red Green Blue. |