All my friends were super jealous of my new piece of art - an oil painting of circus clowns storming the beaches of Normandy.

"A-ha!" said Eric to the three men in green. "This picture of a man is MINE!" he yelled.

"I am so formidable, that by holding this portrait of a random man, I can remove all color from the world! Except for green sweaters." And so he did and the three passers-by with funky hair, who coincidently wore the same green sweater, were amazed by it.

Muhahaha! I didn't say this is a sucky self-portrait, I said it's a soul-sucking portrait!

The French artist was trying to revolutionize the world of art by painting himself painting himself painting himself....etc. etc., but an ice ghost kept getting in his way and distracting him.